Introduction to feminine & masculine core wounds

In this module, we will explore the deep-rooted feminine & masculine core wounds that shape the emotional and spiritual journeys of many men & women. These wounds, often developed in childhood through emotional neglect or disconnection, are not always the result of extreme trauma but instead arise from subtle experiences where our needs for love, validation, and safety were not fully met. As a result, many women carry beliefs of being "not enough," fears of abandonment, and fears of rejection into adulthood.

This module will guide you through understanding these core wounds—where they come from, how they manifest in our relationships and behaviours, and, most importantly, how to begin healing them. By recognising these wounds as forms of emotional trauma, we can take the first steps toward reclaiming our true power and worth as women.

You will discover how these wounds are connected to childhood experiences and societal conditioning, and you'll be introduced to the path of healing. Together, we will explore how to release the grip of these wounds and return to a state of wholeness, where you feel worthy, empowered, and fully authentic in all areas of your life.

Module 2 content

Video - The core feminine & masculine wounds
Feminine trauma & societal conditioning
Practical exercises
The role of the nervous system in trauma healing
Healing the core wounds
Video - Generational trauma & the legacy we carry
Guided meditation

Common Core Wounds in Men

Just as women often carry wounds of not being enough, rejection, and abandonment, men frequently experience core wounds tied to identity, emotional expression, and self-worth. Below is a list of common core wounds many men struggle with:

Fear of Failure
- Societal pressures often condition men to equate their worth with their success or achievements. A perceived failure can trigger deep feelings of inadequacy and shame.
Fear of Weakness or Vulnerability
- Many men grow up internalising the belief that showing emotions is a sign of weakness. This wound often results in emotional suppression and difficulty forming deep, authentic relationships.
Fear of Not Being Respected
- Respect is often closely tied to a man's sense of identity and self-esteem. Being disrespected or disregarded can deeply wound a man’s sense of worth.
Fear of Abandonment
- Similar to women, many men also carry abandonment wounds. This can lead to issues with trust, intimacy, and emotional availability in relationships.
Fear of Not Being Good Enough
- Men may feel that they are not good enough as providers, partners, or fathers, often due to unrealistic societal expectations or critical early life experiences.
Fear of Emotional Disconnection
- Some men carry wounds related to emotional disconnection, either from parents during childhood or from partners in adulthood. This can result in a deep longing for connection but fear of vulnerability.

Trauma and Societal Conditioning

Trauma isn’t always defined by major life events like abuse or neglect—it can also come from the seemingly smaller moments where emotional needs were unmet, validation was withheld, or we were taught to suppress our authentic selves to fit into societal norms. This subtle but pervasive emotional trauma is what creates the core feminine wounds we will be discussing.

Many women & men have grown up in environments where they were conditioned to believe that their value is tied to external factors—appearance, success, or how well they conform to societal standards of femininity. This conditioning creates emotional wounds that become ingrained in our psyche. These wounds affect how we see ourselves and how we show up in relationships and the world.

Understanding trauma as more than just extreme events is crucial in this module. It helps frame the subtle emotional disconnections, invalidations, and expectations that many women have faced as real, impactful forms of trauma. Healing begins with acknowledging that your emotional experiences, even if they don’t fit the traditional definition of trauma, are still valid and deserving of attention and healing.

Practical Exercises: Identifying and Healing Core Wounds

In this section, we’ll go over several exercises designed to help you identify, confront, and begin to heal the core feminine wounds you may carry.

1. Core Wound Journaling

A powerful way to begin healing is by becoming conscious of your core wounds. Through journaling, you can reflect on your early experiences and the beliefs you may have formed as a result.

Instructions:

Set aside quiet time and take out your journal.
Begin by reflecting on your childhood and early life experiences. Ask yourself:
- Were there times when you felt “not enough” (not loved, not valued, not seen)?
- Were there moments when you felt abandoned—physically or emotionally?
- Were there times when you felt rejected for expressing your true self?
For each of these questions, write down specific memories or situations that arise. Don’t filter or judge the memories; just let them flow.
Once you’ve written these experiences down, ask yourself:
- What belief about myself or others did I form because of this experience?
- How does this belief show up in my adult life today?
For example, you might uncover a belief like, “I’m unworthy of love unless I’m perfect,” or “People always leave me.”

This exercise will help you identify the root of your core wounds. From here, you can start to address the underlying beliefs that continue to affect your self-perception and behavior.

2. Inner Child Visualisation

Many core wounds are formed in childhood when our emotional needs weren’t met. Healing these wounds involves reconnecting with your inner child—the part of you that still carries these emotional imprints—and offering her the love, validation, and support she didn’t receive.

Instructions:

Find a quiet space where you won’t be disturbed. Close your eyes and take several deep breaths to centre yourself.
Visualise yourself as a child, perhaps around the age when you first remember feeling “not enough,” abandoned, or rejected.
Imagine this younger version of yourself standing in front of you. What does she look like? What emotions does she carry? How does she feel?
Now, as your adult self, step forward and embrace her. Speak to her gently, offering the words of comfort and reassurance that she needed but may not have received.
- Say things like, “You are loved just as you are,” or “You don’t have to be perfect to be worthy of love,” or “You are safe, and I will always be here for you.”
Allow this visualisation to be a moment of healing and reconnection with your younger self. Feel the love and compassion flowing between your adult self and your inner child.
Stay with this visualisation for a few minutes, then gently open your eyes.

This exercise can be deeply healing and is something you can return to whenever you feel the core wounds surfacing.

3. Rewriting Your Story

Once you’ve identified the core wounds and beliefs, it’s important to consciously rewrite the narrative that has shaped your life. This exercise helps you reclaim your power and change the way you see yourself.

Instructions:

Reflect on one of the core wounds you uncovered in your journaling—whether it’s the belief that you’re “not enough,” fear of abandonment, or fear of rejection.
On one side of the page, write out the story that wound has been telling you. For example:
- “I’ve always had to prove myself to be loved.”
- “I’m not worthy of consistent love and care.”
- “If I show my true self, I’ll be rejected.”
On the other side of the page, write the new story you want to live by. Replace the limiting beliefs with empowering ones. For example:
- “I am worthy of love simply for who I am.”
- “I deserve to be cared for, and I can provide that care for myself.”
- “I am safe to be fully myself, and the right people will accept me.”

By writing and reflecting on this new story, you begin the process of rewiring your subconscious and aligning with beliefs that support your healing and empowerment.

4. Self-Compassion Meditation

One of the most important aspects of healing core feminine wounds is learning to offer yourself the compassion that you may not have received from others. This meditation helps cultivate self-compassion, which is essential for soothing the wounds of “not enough” and fear of abandonment or rejection.

Instructions:

Find a quiet space and sit comfortably with your eyes closed.
Take a few deep breaths and bring your attention to your heart space.
Visualise a warm, glowing light in your heart, representing compassion and love.
As you breathe, let this light expand throughout your body, filling every part of you with warmth and kindness.
Now, silently repeat these affirmations:
- “I am worthy of love and compassion.”
- “I offer myself the care and kindness that I deserve.”
- “I accept myself fully, just as I am.”
If painful thoughts or emotions arise during this meditation, simply acknowledge them and let the light of compassion soften them. Remind yourself that you are human, and all of your feelings are valid.
Continue this meditation for 5-10 minutes, then slowly open your eyes, carrying this feeling of self-compassion into your day.

The Role of the Nervous System in Trauma and Healing

When we discuss trauma and core wounds, it’s important to understand the role of the nervous system. Trauma affects how our nervous system responds to stress, leaving many women in a constant state of hypervigilance, where we feel anxious, unsafe, or emotionally guarded, or in states of shutdown, where we feel disconnected, numb, or detached from our emotions and the world around us.

Practical Exercise: Self-Regulation for Emotional Healing

Learning to regulate your nervous system is key to healing core wounds, as it allows you to move out of trauma responses and into a state of safety and connection.

Instructions:

Grounding Techniques: If you feel anxious, overwhelmed, or emotionally triggered, use grounding techniques to bring yourself back into the present moment:
- Five Senses Grounding: Name five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. This will help reorient your mind to the present.
- Breathwork: Practice deep breathing to calm the nervous system. Inhale for four counts, hold for four counts, and exhale for six counts. Repeat this until you feel more centred and calm.
Self-Soothing: When feelings of abandonment or rejection arise, practice self-soothing. Hold your heart or wrap your arms around yourself as if giving yourself a hug, and say words of comfort like, “I am safe,” or “I am loved.” This helps reassure your nervous system that you are not in immediate danger.

Healing the Core Wounds

Healing core feminine wounds is a journey that requires time, patience, and self-compassion. Here are a few more strategies to assist in healing these wounds:

1. Develop Healthy Boundaries

Many women with core wounds of “not enough” or fear of abandonment struggle with boundaries. We may feel that we have to overgive or people-please to maintain love and connection. Learning to set healthy boundaries is crucial for healing.

Boundary Exercise: Identify one area in your life where you tend to overextend yourself—whether with a partner, friend, or at work. Reflect on how this might stem from a fear of rejection or abandonment.
Practice saying “no” when you feel stretched too thin, and remind yourself that your needs are just as important as anyone else’s.

2. Inner Dialogue Reprogramming

Change the way you talk to yourself. Instead of letting your inner critic reinforce old wounds, practice speaking kindly and encouragingly to yourself. This is especially important when you encounter triggers that activate your core wounds.

Empowerment through Healing

The core feminine wounds of “I’m not enough,” fear of abandonment, and fear of rejection are deeply intertwined with how we experience trauma and societal conditioning. By engaging in these exercises, you begin the essential work of healing these wounds and reclaiming your true worth and power.

As you heal, you will begin to see shifts in how you relate to others, how you show up in the world, and how you see yourself. The path to healing is not about becoming “perfect” or “fixed,” but about embracing yourself fully, with all your imperfections, and knowing that you are worthy of love and acceptance simply as you are.

In the next module, we will explore the practice of authenticity and how living in alignment with your true self can bring you into deeper connection with others and your own inner power.

Mirror Work

Have you ever noticed patterns in your life where similar types of people or situations seem to show up time and again? Perhaps you keep encountering people who make you feel unworthy, dismissed, or manipulated, as if they somehow know exactly where your insecurities lie. It’s natural to feel hurt, even angry, at the people who make us feel this way. But what if these relationships weren’t just random occurrences? What if, on a subconscious level, we’re actually inviting people into our lives to reflect back our core wounds? This isn’t about blaming ourselves—it’s about understanding that the universe offers us these experiences as a unique, if difficult, gift; a mirror to see what’s unhealed within us.

Imagine that every challenging interaction, every painful relationship, is life’s way of gently (or sometimes not so gently) pointing us towards our deepest wounds. We aren’t consciously choosing to be hurt or manipulated, but our subconscious beliefs—formed from past experiences and unhealed pain—can create an “energetic invitation” that draws in certain people or situations that resonate with those wounds. These interactions act as mirrors, reflecting back exactly where we need to heal.

Why We Keep Attracting the Same Patterns

If someone walked up to you and said, “You don’t have legs,” you wouldn’t feel hurt or offended because you know it’s obviously untrue. Their words wouldn’t resonate with any belief or insecurity you hold. A mirror can’t reflect what isn’t there. But when someone says something that taps into a wound—like making you feel unloved, inadequate, or invisible—it stings deeply because there’s a part of you that believes it, even if it’s hidden from your conscious awareness. The hurt you feel is a signal from your subconscious, revealing that this wound exists within you. A mirror can’t reflect what isn’t there.

For instance, if you carry an unhealed belief that you’re not good enough, you might find yourself in relationships with people who constantly make you feel small or dismissed. The experience feels painful, but on a subconscious level, it’s an invitation to recognise this belief and heal it. In this way, the universe is presenting us with the opportunity to see the parts of ourselves that need healing and growth. Until we heed this invitation, we may find ourselves stuck in similar patterns, wondering why the same kinds of people or experiences keep showing up.

Seeing Triggers as Universal Gifts

When someone triggers us, it’s easy to focus outward, blaming the person or situation. But by turning inward and examining why we feel so affected, we can start to see the universal gift that lies within each trigger. Each reaction, each painful moment, is like a spotlight on a part of ourselves that’s asking for healing. This isn’t to say we’re consciously inviting mistreatment, but our unhealed wounds act as beacons, attracting situations that help us see them more clearly, but our typical response is to blame the mirror.

For example, if you find yourself saying, “Don’t treat me like I’m stupid,” consider that this reaction might reflect an unconscious belief that you’re not intelligent enough. If you didn’t hold this belief, those words wouldn’t affect you, just like being told you don’t have legs wouldn’t faze you. The reaction comes from an unhealed part of you, and the mirror—no matter how painful—is simply showing you what needs healing.

Typical Conversation with Projected Wounds

Person A: “You made me feel stupid because you spoke to me like a child!”

Person B: “Well, you act like one! What choice do I have?”

In this exchange, both parties project their unhealed wounds onto each other. Person A feels hurt and accuses Person B of making them feel stupid, while Person B, likely feeling defensive, responds by belittling Person A further. This back-and-forth escalates emotions, reinforcing feelings of hurt, frustration, and misunderstanding.

Conscious Conversation with Awareness of Core Wounds

Person A: “I’m feeling triggered right now because something inside of me is bringing up a core wound that makes me feel ‘not enough.’ I need a few minutes to regulate my emotions before we continue this conversation.”

Person A takes a pause, practicing self-awareness and giving themselves time to calm their reaction. After a few moments, they continue:

Person A: “I recognise that the way I feel isn’t entirely about what you said, but about something deeper in me. I’d like to talk about this in a way that helps us both understand each other better.”

Person B: “Thank you for sharing that. I know I have my own things that come up too, and I want to be supportive. I didn’t mean to make you feel that way.”

In this exchange, Person A is aware of their own wound of “not feeling enough” and recognises the need to pause and regulate rather than reacting immediately. By expressing their emotions without blame, they invite Person B to respond with compassion and openness, which allows for genuine communication rather than a defensive argument.

Continuing the Conversation with Greater Self-Awareness

Person A: “I’m working on healing this part of me that sometimes feels unworthy, and I realise that when I feel spoken to in a certain way, it taps into that wound. I know you probably didn’t intend that. Maybe we can find a way to communicate that doesn’t make me feel that way.”

Person B: “I appreciate you being honest. I have my own triggers around feeling criticised, and I think sometimes that’s why I react defensively. Let’s try to be more aware of this so we can have these conversations without getting stuck in our old patterns.”

Transforming the Pain into Empowerment

When we recognise that these patterns are subconscious invitations to heal, we can shift from feeling powerless to feeling empowered. Instead of saying, “Why does this keep happening to me?” we can ask, “What is this experience trying to teach me about myself? What belief or wound within me is being reflected here?” This shift is transformative. Rather than seeing ourselves as victims of others’ behaviour, we see that these experiences offer us a powerful opportunity to heal and grow.

By engaging with these universal gifts, we can begin to change our inner narrative. We can work on affirming our worth, releasing limiting beliefs, and nurturing the parts of ourselves that feel unworthy, unloved, or inadequate. As we do this inner work, we shift our energy. We no longer send out the “invitation” for these painful reflections, and as a result, we start attracting people and experiences that mirror our newfound self-worth and inner peace.

Using the Mirror as a Tool for Healing

Notice Patterns: Begin by observing any recurring types of people or situations in your life. These patterns are clues, showing you where there’s an opportunity for healing.
Identify the Belief Behind the Pain: When you feel triggered, take a moment to look inward. Ask yourself, “What part of me believes this could be true? Why does this feel so familiar?”
Embrace the Trigger as a Gift: Recognise that this pain is here to guide you. The universe is offering you a chance to see your unhealed wounds so that you can release them.
Heal the Wound: Work on releasing old beliefs and affirming your worth. As you heal, you’ll find that these situations start to shift, reflecting your inner growth.
Observe the Change: As you heal, you’ll naturally attract different types of people and experiences—ones that respect, honour, and uplift you.

Freedom from the Mirror

By accepting these difficult moments as universal gifts, we can move from a place of suffering to a place of empowerment. When we heal our inner wounds, we no longer attract people or situations that mirror them back to us. We stop experiencing the same patterns and instead, create a life filled with relationships that reflect our true worth.

A mirror can only reflect what’s present. As we do the work to heal, we find that the painful reflections start to disappear. Instead of being surrounded by reminders of our wounds, we’re surrounded by reflections of our wholeness, our growth, and our newfound self-love. Embracing this journey isn’t easy, but it leads to a life of true empowerment—where we’re no longer at the mercy of our wounds, but free to experience a reality that reflects our healed, authentic selves.

meditation

Meditation Description: Healing Your Inner Child and Embracing Self-Worth

This guided meditation is designed to help you connect with your inner child—the part of you that still carries emotional wounds from the past. Throughout the meditation, you’ll be guided to offer comfort, love, and reassurance to your inner child, healing the wounds of feeling “not enough,” the fear of abandonment, and the fear of rejection.

By speaking directly to your inner child, you will offer her the words of compassion and support she may not have received during your formative years. This practice allows you to integrate her back into your heart, where she can feel safe and loved.

As you move through the meditation, you will use affirmations to strengthen your sense of self-worth and release old beliefs that no longer serve you. The session concludes with a powerful visualisation that helps you embody your authentic self, standing confidently in the world, surrounded by love and light.

This meditation serves as a gentle yet transformative experience, helping you reconnect with your true self and affirm your worthiness of love, care, and respect. Afterward, you’ll feel grounded, empowered, and more aligned with the belief that you are, and always have been, enough.

Module 2 – Feminine & Masculine Core Wounds

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