It’s very easy in this day and age to criticise everything around us. It is clear that we are in one hell of a mess on this beautiful planet, from governments destroying the economy to our freedom being removed in front of our eyes. For those of you awake to the systemic sabotage of birth, we could easily look upon this system with the same exhaustion as everything else. Women are lied to, tortured and shoved through a conveyor belt system with little regard to their autonomy. Yes this is a huge problem, but should we focus on that in order to change the world?
It is said that the foundation of all human behaviour is either love or fear. And when we examine the way our society approaches the sacred and transformative experience of childbirth, it becomes clear that fear is indeed at the root of our maternity services.
From the moment a woman discovers she is pregnant, she is bombarded with messages of danger and risk. She is told that her body may not be capable of giving birth without intervention, that her baby may be in peril, and that only the constant vigilance of medical professionals can ensure a safe outcome. This fear-based approach to childbirth has resulted in a system that prioritises medical intervention over physiological processes, and often leaves mothers feeling disempowered and traumatised by their birth experience.
It is time for us to recognise that this fear-based approach to childbirth is not serving women or their families. It is causing harm and creating a culture of mistrust between mothers and the medical establishment. Women deserve better. They deserve to be supported and empowered throughout the journey of pregnancy and birth, rather than being made to feel like victims in need of rescue.
So instead of criticising, we must create! We will be no better than the fear based maternity system if we continue to focus upon the wrong they are doing. This is also fear! Instead we must create.
We must acknowledge that our maternity services are not neutral, but are instead shaped by the values and beliefs of the society in which they exist. And when that society is steeped in fear, it is not surprising that the services it provides are likewise fear-based. But we have the power to change this. By embracing a more holistic, love-based approach to childbirth, we can create a new narrative that prioritises the well-being of mothers and babies and recognises the transformative power of birth as a natural and sacred process.
It is time to release our fears and trust in the wisdom of women’s bodies and the journey of childbirth. Let us create a world where women are supported and celebrated as they bring new life into the world, and where the medical establishment serves as a partner in this sacred process, rather than as the gatekeeper of safety.
Our collective consciousness is a powerful force, shaping the world as we know it. For far too long, fear has held sway over our hearts and minds, creating a world that is devoid of
love, compassion and peace. We see the consequences of this fear-based consciousness all around us, in the form of division, hatred, violence, war and in this instance, the sabotage of childbirth.
But there is hope. For as surely as fear has shaped our world, love can shape it anew. Love is the ultimate transformative power, the light that illuminates the shadows and dispels the darkness. It is the antidote to fear, the balm that soothes our wounds and the fire that fuels our passions.
We need to shift our collective consciousness from fear to love, for this is the only way to heal the wounds of the past and build a world of peace, compassion and justice. This is no easy task, for fear has a deep grip on our hearts and minds. However we must have the courage to look fear in the face and choose love instead.
To make this shift, we must first examine our own hearts and minds, and root out the fear that lurks within. We must learn to love ourselves and to treat ourselves with compassion and kindness. This self-love is the foundation of all love, and it must be nourished and cultivated if we are to change the world. Childbirth is a natural process that will unfold just beautifully without constant medical supervision for most of you. We occasionally need the expertise of well trained medical professionals when we experience complications, but this should be very rare indeed.
Next, we must reach out to others with love, even those who may be our enemies. We must learn to see the divine in every human being, and to treat them with the respect and dignity that they deserve. This does not mean that we condone their actions, but that we seek to understand their pain and to offer them a path to healing and reconciliation.
We must act with love, putting it into practice in all that we do. When we hold space for the birthing woman, this must be done without judgement, fear and our own limited beliefs. We must work for justice, compassion and peace, and be willing to stand up against all forms of oppression and injustice. We must do this not out of a sense of obligation or duty, but out of a deep and abiding love for all humanity. We cannot just stand there and criticise a fear based maternity system or try to change it from the inside. We can however mind our own business and build a better way. When we operate from a collective of love, the rest will follow. We will have a ripple effect.
The world as we know it is shaped by our collective consciousness, and we have the power to shape it anew. Let us choose love, and build a world that reflects the boundless compassion, kindness and peace that reside in the hearts of all human beings.
It is time for us to shift our collective consciousness and break free from the obsession with drama in childbirth. This is not just about the experience of giving birth, but about how we view the very process of creation and birth itself.
Just as every thought and belief we hold has the power to shape our reality, our perception of birth and its role in society has the power to shape the way the world sees and experiences it. When we fixate on the drama and fear surrounding childbirth, we perpetuate
a cycle of negativity and pain that not only affects those giving birth, but also impacts future generations. This is why fixating on a broken system will only create more fear.
It’s time to shift our focus and cultivate a new narrative, one of love, trust, and empowerment. We must let go of the fear-based beliefs that have dominated our thinking for too long and embrace a new paradigm of conscious creation and conscious birth. This means being present in each moment, surrendering to the natural flow of life, and trusting in the wisdom of the body.
As we make this shift, we will see a transformation in the way birth is experienced and perceived. Women will be empowered to trust their own bodies and instincts, and birth will become a sacred and transformative experience, filled with love, joy, and excitement.
In the words of Marianne Williamson, “As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.” So let us shine our light, and together, let us change the world’s perception of birth.
This is not to say anyone has the right to tell any woman how and where to give birth. Free will is a beautiful thing and as long as women have access to information so they can make informed decisions, as well as support from loving individuals this world will be a better place. This must start with you. If we focus our attention on what’s wrong with the current system, we only perpetuate negativity and limit our ability to create positive change.
The maternity system is no exception to this principle. If we constantly criticise and dwell on the faults of the current system, we only block our own progress and prevent the creation of a new and improved system. Instead, we must shift our focus to what we want to create and take action towards bringing that vision into existence.
We must simply mind our own business! This means focusing on our own thoughts and emotions, and not getting caught up in the negativity or drama of others. When it comes to the maternity system, this means focusing on our own experiences and desires, rather than getting caught up in the criticism of others.
To continue the work of our new and alternative maternity structure at When Push Comes To Shove, we must first change our own mindset and cultivate a positive, solution-focused perspective. This means focusing on what we want the system to look like, and taking action to bring that vision into existence. We must actively participate in the creation of our new structure. This is why all of our courses are centred around self development.
The integration of spiritual and self-development elements in our birth training courses are based on the belief that birth is not only a physical event, but also an emotional, mental, and spiritual experience. By focusing on spiritual and self-development, our birth workers can support women in having a transformative birth experience, which can positively impact birth outcomes.
Studies have shown that a woman’s state of mind during labour and birth can affect the outcome of the birth. A woman who feels empowered, supported, and connected to her inner self and spirituality is more likely to have a successful and fulfilling birth experience. By helping women tap into their spiritual and emotional resources and develop a sense of
self-awareness and self-confidence, doulas can help women approach birth with a positive mindset, which can result in better birth outcomes.
Additionally, spiritual and self-development practices such as meditation, visualisation, and self-reflection can help women develop coping mechanisms for managing stress and fear during labour and birth. By reducing stress and fear, women are better able to relax and focus on the birthing process, which can lead to a smoother and less complicated birth experience.
Our statistics from 2022 show very clearly why this approach is working.
In 2022 of the women we supported, 60% were considered ‘high risk’ yet contrary to mainstream predictions of how their birth should have unfolded, their experiences were very different indeed.
- ● 36% had successful freebirths
- ● Only 4% had a stretch and sweep
- ● Only 4% experienced other forms of induction
- ● Only 12% had continual fetal monitoring
- ● 60% had no pain relief whatsoever
- ● 80% of women did NOT have vaginal exams
- ● 66.7% gave birth in water
- ● 68.8% gave birth at home
- ● 11% Emergency Caesarean operation
- ● Only 4.5% gave birth on their back
- ● 76% experienced a physiological third stage of labour
- ● 88% Delayed cord clamping
- ● 100% of babies breastfed
As exciting as these statistics may seem, this should be normal! So let’s all aim for normal. The trauma stories you hear about are common, not normal. Together we can birth a new earth and it has to start with you. So whether you want to train with us to serve the world by attending births or you want to engage one of our natural birth attendants, When Push Comes To Shove is pathing the way to better birth.
So let’s take a step back from the criticism, focus on our own experiences, and take action towards creating a new and improved maternity system that truly serves the needs of all individuals involved. This is the future of maternity care, this is When Push Comes To Shove.